An Oldham man has credited a local cancer charity with saving his life alongside the NHS. James Price, 67, says the support from Maggie’s in Oldham helped him recover after he was diagnosed with mouth cancer for the third time.
The local grandfather was first diagnosed in 2000 and has since undergone three extensive facial surgeries. James says: "Coming to Maggie’s has changed my life and my family’s lives. I know this because they tell me. When I was first diagnosed with mouth cancer in 2000, I thought that it was the end and I would have to write my will straight away. But I was very fortunate in that I had a brilliant consultant and she was able to operate and take the cancer away."
"Myself and my wife, Audrey, cried at that very first appointment when I was diagnosed with cancer after having what I thought was just a small sore on my gum. But the consultant went on to tell me about an operation that I could have and told me that it would mean a very long and substantial surgery."
"It would mean cutting in to my lip and my cheek and my chin to open everything up to give access to where the cancer was to take it away, but it would also mean I would be left with severe facial disfiguration."
"I went away with a lot to think about but, obviously, I was going to have the surgery – for me and my wife and my two kids. I was only 40 at the time. But I don’t think I fully registered what it would mean for me and my family. At that point, I was going to take every chance to fight for survival."
The initial surgery was successful but left James feeling very isolated and lacking in confidence. James says: "This affected all of my relationships; my relationship with my wife, my kids, all of my family and friends. I didn’t want to see anyone."
"I would take myself away to my bedroom because I didn’t want to look at myself and I didn’t want my wife or my kids to see me either. They’d be crying in one room and I’d be crying in another. It was awful."
"I was angry about what had happened to me, and I almost became a recluse until my wife sat me down and told me ‘to go to my GP for help and support.’ I was longing to be close to them but everything that had happened to me meant I had put up barriers."
"I did eventually go to my doctor and I was given medicine and counselling and it did help. I also needed a lot of speech and language therapy to be able to speak again and I looked very, very different."
After 15 years of being cancer-free, the illness returned in 2015 and again in 2019. James says: "It took an awful long time for me to be able to get back to being me and to really not care about what people said."
"People can sometimes be cruel and say terrible things about your appearance when they don’t know your circumstances. I can understand that when it’s young children saying things or asking questions but sometimes adults can be pretty awful and callous too, but over the years, I’ve grown to have a thicker skin."
"Once I’d got past the five-year mark, I thought that was it and I’d be cancer-free but my consultant was great and he continued to see me every 12 months just to make sure there weren’t any changes."
"Sadly, it hasn’t been plain sailing and my cancer has now come back twice – first in 2015 and then in 2019. When it came back for the second time, I think we all panicked as a family and Audrey said to me, ‘James, we can’t go down the same route as the last time’. I knew I couldn’t myself because mentally I couldn’t cope and I isolated myself after that first big operation."
James found that visiting the bright yellow Maggie’s centre in Oldham felt like a warm hug during his treatment. He said: "When I first had cancer, Maggie’s didn’t exist and I did not cope very well, I nearly didn’t cope at all. Fortunately, by the second time I was diagnosed, Maggie’s did exist, and it was helpful for me to come in for support. I was a bit scared to come through the doors the first time, but I was so glad I did."
"Coming in to Maggie’s Oldham with it’s warm, yellow décor is genuinely like walking into a room full of sunshine – it’s like walking into a big, warm hug. Everyone there from the staff to the volunteers, they are all so caring and helpful and you automatically know you’re in a very safe space."
"It did me the world of good because I didn’t want to upset my family with everything I was going through again, and Maggie’s was a place where I could talk about what I was going through including my fears without any judgement."
"The staff and other centre visitors understood – even if they didn’t have the same cancer as me, others were going through something similar. They knew how I was feeling and they were able to offer support."
The physical journey has been difficult, requiring James to learn how to walk and speak again multiple times. He adds: "Each diagnosis has been shocking, and I’ve had gruelling treatment three times now. There has been a lot of weight loss through periods when I couldn’t eat. I’ve had muscles removed from my shoulder to replace muscles in my jaw."
"At one point, I thought I might be left having to feed through a tube for the rest of my life, but I was determined to regain my swallow again and I did. I’ve also had an oblique muscle from my hip removed to replace muscle in my jaw to allow my face to move and for me to speak again."
"I’ve even had to learn to walk again after my last operation. I am very aware that I have been very fortunate that my consultants have been able to work wonders with me over the years, and I know I am lucky to be alive."
"After everything I have been through – three lots of operations, three lots of speech and language therapy – I’ve had rehabilitation three times, but I am slowly learning to live with cancer."
James now attends the Men’s Group every Tuesday, which he says puts him back together like a jigsaw. He says: "Since my third diagnosis, when I visit the hospital, I always come over to Maggie’s Oldham and I come to the Men’s Group every Tuesday. As the week goes on after our sessions, I can feel a bit like a jigsaw that is coming loose again but when I come into the Men’s Group, they put me back together."
"It’s only through coming to the Men’s Group in the last two and a half years that I’ve really felt able to open-up and tell my full story – it’s where I can open-up and bare my soul."
"Generally men don’t talk but it just takes one person to open-up for others to feel that they are able to genuinely share their feelings and their thoughts and fears. That’s not something you can get outside Maggie’s or down the pub."
"And we don’t always talk about cancer. We talk about everything, football and holidays too, and we have a laugh. We even have a Whatsapp group and we have regular outings to the football or to somewhere in the city or, we go for a pint."
The support has allowed James to enjoy life again, including cooking family meals like Moroccan Lamb. He continued: "Coming to Maggie’s has changed my life. It really has. It’s pieced me back together and allowed me to be the husband, the father and the grandad that I always wanted to be."
"The NHS saved my physically but coming to Maggie’s has allowed me to get back to living my life as full as I can. Audrey and I love going on holidays and days out and going out for meals with the family."
"I always enjoyed my food before cancer and I liked to cook but after my diagnosis there was a long hiatus where I didn’t cook anything. I could barely eat anything for a long time – it was a liquid diet. Now, I’m back cooking old family favourites like Moroccan Lamb."
"Since coming to the Men’s Group at Maggie’s, I am also pleased to say that I’m on no medication at all. The Maggie’s Men’s Group is my medication. Maggie’s has been like Red Bull to me – it has given me wings!"
James is now supporting the charity's Spring Appeal to help ensure others can access the same care. Trish Morgan, centre head at Maggie’s Oldham, adds: "We are so pleased that we’ve been able to offer such great support to James and his family. He has come a very long way since he first visited the centre and it’s great to see him grow in confidence and he really is enjoying life again. We’re very grateful to James for sharing his story and hope that this will encourage many more men to come to Maggie’s for support."
"Maggie’s is celebrating it’s 30th anniversary this year and we rely almost entirely on voluntary donations from individuals and the local to enable our professional team to provide specialist cancer support, psychological support and benefits advice for absolutely everyone who needs it. The best bit is that no one needs an appointment to visit Maggie’s. Anyone who is worried about cancer can just come in."
